Today is the end of my 9-month Fulbright grant to teach solutions journalism in Bangalore.
I concluded my work at Mount Carmel College when I submitted my final grades on Tuesday. Most definitively marking the passage of time is the difference between the tiny 9-week-old baby girl I left at home on that first day of work in July and the same little girl who crawl-ran to meet me at the door on Tuesday when I returned from campus.
I scooped her up. “We did it!” Her daddy joined us by the door. I pecked him on the cheek, squirming kid between us. “We did it!”
Just like that – Here I am. Here we are. Fulbrighter alumni. All of us.
It has been my Fulbright grant and work, and our family’s collective Fulbright experience. We chose that they not be exclusive, and I choose to talk about one simultaneously with the other.
It meant that in those early months of work, my day was split into 2-hour chunks to accommodate our breastfeeding schedule. It meant sometimes I didn’t return to the office just to sit at a desk.
It meant pumping and stashing milk in the freezer for the days I couldn’t be home in time for her next feeding. It meant always calculating hours and ounces.
It meant leaving meetings early and saying no to some.
It meant saying yes to conference and speaking requests but first “know that my husband and baby are coming too, otherwise no.”
It meant saying yes to committee service, but first “know that my husband and baby are coming too and at noon I’ll step out to feed her.”
It meant learning through blunders what we needed when we traveled and then making those requests: a room in the same hotel venue as the conference. A fridge. Don’t forget to pack my breast pump.
It meant she came with us to lectures and it meant we said no to most things past bedtime.
It meant that if I were seen alone, she was never off my mind or heart, knowing that my yes to this was a no to her which would hopefully lead to a stronger yes next time.
It meant that a few days she went to class with me, and that for a couple meetings she went too.
My work has taken us to three countries (not including India and then Maldives for vacation), and in India, we’ve traveled to 16 cities/towns in five states. We’ve lived many simple days in the sanctuary of our Bangalore home.
Our Fulbright experience as new parents has made it unique and rich. She created opportunities for us and attracted such goodness into our lives.
We will return to Texas in the end of June. Between now and then and now that work will slow, you’ll hear more reflections from me about my work, my first year of motherhood, and what’s next. You’ll hear from Murali too, and in a special way that’s been a long time to unveiling.
For now, I’m sitting in and reflecting on this surreal moment, this ending, and allowing myself to contemplate what that feels like and what it inspires within. #alladaindia #fulbright #gratitude
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