I say this coming off a really busy week.
Road-tripping 800-something miles in an overnight trip.
Guest lecturing in five classrooms at my alma mater.
“Appearing” on radio.
Visiting with friends.
Flying home.
Lecturing during my own classes.
Grading.
Meetings.
Car exploding.
Car shopping.
All legitimate busy things.
But as I prepared to spend quality time with my partner over the weekend – our reunion after being a part for two weeks – I realized that the busy-ness of the previous four weeks had eroded into my inner peace.
My full to-do list and meticulous organization and execution of daily tasks (albeit important ones) had become a mental weight. Efficiency reigned (most of the time), yes. But moments of stillness were interrupted with tremors of panic: “There’s something I SHOULD be doing right now!” and I started sacrificing my daily walks and weekly hikes for the sake of another priority.
What do you have to get done today?
And I would honestly answer myself: this and this and this.
All very manageable. All very doable.
So why I was trapped under the weight of overwhelm-ed-ness?
I asked myself: why are you trapped under the weight of overwhelm-ed-ness?
To which I honestly answered: busy has unintentionally become your state of mind. (Combined with your propensity for productivity.)
It’s not an easy thing to unravel. There’s no magical solution or an easy fix.
It’s a moment-by-moment decision.
It’s making a priority list – what needs to be done first? And then blocking out time to accomplish that.
For me, it’s often not about having less to do, especially when all the things I’m doing are of equal importance. (Though I am still learning the value of saying “no.”)
It’s about getting shit done. Peacefully. Acknowledging the tasks at hand and intentionally accomplishing them. And having the wisdom to know when you’ve done enough for one day.
It’s about sinking into a cadence.
Creating. Resting.
Creating. Resting.
Or.
Resting. Creating.
Resting. Creating.
You see, my mind defaults to resting as the aftermath of creating. And, even worse, resting sometimes becomes the punishment of creating.
But what if resting is actually its precursor?
What if to rest is synonymous with to create?
I think there might be a connection.
*mind blown*
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